ROXIE 1: Lost Cause
[Roxanne]
Wearing only a thin dress that flutters against my skin–no makeup, not even a comb through my hair–tears stream unchecked down my face. I must look completely unhinged as I wander aimlessly around the ship’s deck.
I.don’t have a phone–Gideon took it. Just another way to cut me off from everyone, to control who could reach me.
I wanted out of this goddamn life!
There’s no reason to keep going anymore, not after my brother died a few months ago. Thomas was in a coma for three brutal years… and now he’s gone.
A scream ripped out of me, echoing over the endless ocean and blending with the constant hum of the ship’s engines. It didn’t help much–the tightness in my chest was still there, heavy as ever.
A woman’s laugh cut through my grief. When I turned, I saw Zara Montclaire.
The most wicked woman I’ve ever met. If evil had a female face, it’d be hers. The male version? Gideon Blake.
“No point in screaming,” she said with a smug twist of her lips. She’s made a sport of ruining my life.
“There’s no point in guilt–tripping me! You can have Gideon! Take him! Do whatever the hell you want with him!” I snapped.
can have
But even as the words came out, that all–too–familiar ache settled in my chest–the kind that only shows up when I think about the man I gave my heart to for five years, even though I was just his convenient bedmate for three. The same man I stupidly believed I could win over with enough patience and love.
‘Stupid heart!‘
After Thomas died, I realized–there’s no point in anything anymore.
But Gideon Blake won’t even let me die.
He wants me to live, to endure the same torment that haunts him daily.
“Of course, Gideon will be mine,” Zara said, as casually as if she were ordering coffee. “But what I also want… is to watch you suffer.”
My jaw tightened.
“Gideon is tormenting me. You want to torment me, even the bodyguard won’t leave me alone! Why not just kill me then?” My whole body trembled, my voice raw and ragged with rage.
The w
Zara looked over her shoulder at the guard behind me. “She wants to end her life. Why don’t you grant Roxie her wish?”
The guard shifted uncomfortably. “Miss Zara, you know I’ll be the one held accountable by the boss…”
Zara reached into her clutch bag and pulled out a kitchen knife, tossing it onto the floor with a sharp clatter.
“Miss Zara!” the bodyguard gasped.
Darkness instantly consumed me. The weight of torment, burnout, and grief that had been crushing me for months all came together in one intense, overwhelming urge.
Without thinking, I grabbed the knife, my fingers gripping the handle as I pressed the blade to my wrist, ready to make the
cut.
“Ahhh!” I screamed, the sound ripping through the silence as I pressed the blade to my skin, preparing to end my suffering.
But unexpectedly, Zara lunged forward and grabbed my arm.
“No, you can’t do that! Roxie, you can’t!” she pleaded, her voice frantic as we struggled over the knife.
The blade sliced across her forearm, drawing an immediate line of crimson.
“Enough!” Gideon’s voice boomed from behind us, firm and commanding. I didn’t see him, but I knew Roxie must have. The bodyguard quickly grabbed the knife from my shaking hands.
With theatrical precision, Zara collapsed to the deck, her shoulders heaving with sobs.
“Gideon! Roxie tried to kill me!” Tears streamed down her face as she clutched her bleeding arm. “Her brother killed Isolde, and now she wants me dead too!”
Gideon’s jaw tightened, the muscles in his neck flexing as he gritted his teeth. Mentioning my brother killing Isolde–the woman he ever loved–was enough to make him see me as guilty without a second thought. To him, there was no excuse, no other side to the story.
“She was the one who gave me the knife!” I protested.
“Absolutely not, Gideon!” Zara protested, her voice trembling with partic. “Why would I give her a knife to hurt me? Ask your
ROXIE 1 Lost Cause
bodyguard–he saw everything!
The bodyguard swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing nervously.
“I didn’t see Miss Roxie take the knife at dinner,” he lied smoothly. “She said she wanted to kill Miss Zara.”
To make the story even more dramatic, crimson liquid started spilling faster from Zara’s wound, soaking into the sleeve of her pricey blouse.
“There’s so much blood!” she gasped, feigning shock, before her eyes rolled back and she collapsed, pretending to faint.
I couldn’t believe how easily Gideon bought into her obvious drama.
Meanwhile, I just stood there, tears falling without control, consumed by this deep hatred for the man I’d loved for five years. “Take Zara to the clinic!” Gideon barked, his face grim as he grabbed my arm and dragged me toward his cabin.
As we moved across the deck, people couldn’t help but stare, fueling the fire of his precious reputation. His grip on my arm tightened, but honestly, the physical pain barely registered next to the ache in my chest.
“I want to die! You don’t even need to keep me alive anymore!” I screamed, pounding my fists against his chest in a mix of rage and desperation, my kicks all over the place.
Out of nowhere, Gideon pressed his lips to mine in a rough, violent kiss, shutting me up completely, stealing my breath. He shoved me back until my legs hit the edge of the bed in his private cabin, the door slamming shut behind us like some kind of final warning.
His face was dark, the anger in his eyes unmistakable.
“Why, Gideon? You took my innocence, made me fall in love with you, stole our family company, and now that my brother Thomas is dead–what more could you possibly want from me?!” I screamed, my voice breaking with pain.
He pushed me roughly onto the bed, looming over me like a storm cloud.
“Why are you doing this to me? If you hate me so much, why don’t you just kill me and be done with it?” I cried out, the weight of everything between us suffocating me.
With unexpected speed, he pinned me to the mattress, his fingers gripping my chin with bruising force.
His face twisted, showing something I hardly ever saw in him–vulnerability under all that anger.
“Because I can’t find peace, Rox!” he roared, his voice cracking. “Why did Isolde die instantly in that car accident while your fucking brother got to live for three more years?! Now that he’s gone too, I don’t know where to direct all this hatred except at you!”
I shook my head.
“I truly regret ever loving you, you monster!” I screamed.
He kissed me again, stern and forceful, like he was trying to punish me with his lips. I could taste his anger, his confusion, his desperate struggle to cope with loss in the only way he knew.
He hated that I wanted to break free from the tangled mess he’d created for us, and yet, I was the one left carrying all his emotional weight.
I never thought I could hate someone this much, especially someone I once loved with everything I had.
In this moment, I understood why Cassie had spoken of Asher with such venom–how love can turn toxic when the betrayal cuts this deep.
Gideon stood up suddenly, his voice low and cold. “You hurt Zara. Stay here until you figure out where you went wrong!” As the door slammed shut, I heard the lock click into place. I curled up on the bed, hugging my knees as sobs shook my body.
Tears that weren’t just from sadness, but from this weird emptiness where my heart used to be. My crying filled the cabin… until it was drowned out by a loud explosion that shook the whole ship.
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