CHAPTER 111: DARE TO LOVE ME Your lover 

Paula 

I looked between them both, unsure of what to say. My blood ran cold as I realized he had 

“forgotten” to mention this tiny detail when we started seeing each other. 

“Nice to meet you. I have to go,” I said. I looked at Patrick, who seemed to want to say something, but I turned around and left. 

I heard the woman say something to him, her voice fading as I walked away. 

Something clenched in my chest, and I pressed my hand against it. I took a deep breath to 

ease the feeling, but it didn’t work. I closed my eyes, but the anger at his deception only 

intensified. 

I opened the apartment door and tried to close it, but an arm stopped it. 

“Go away,” I said when the door opened a little revealing Patrick. 

“I’m not leaving. We need to talk,” he said as he closed the door behind him. 

“Talk now? When you could have told me from the beginning?” I pointed at him angrily. 

“Paula, I know this looks bad.” He rubbed his forehead. “But there’s an explanation for 

everything.” 

“I don’t think there is. You have a wife, and you went looking for a mistress. You made me your mistress!” I threw my things on the kitchen counter. 

“Rachel and I got married very young. We’ve known each other since we were kids,” he explained, and I felt like it was getting worse. “But I think because of that, we’re realizing now that it’s not working, that our marriage isn’t working. And it became clearer to me, after I met you, that I stopped feeling what I felt for her.” 

I scoffed, certain that this was the same story cheaters used to deceive their lovers and keep them around. 

“I’m not interested in your explanations. You lied to her,” I gestured vaguely. “You lied to me!” 

“Paula, you came into my life like a hurricane,” he said, searching my eyes. “When I reacted, it was too late. I wanted to explain it to you.” He ran a hand through his hair. “I know I messed up, that I should have told you, I should have ended my marriage first.” He tried to get closer, but I stepped back. “But you’re inevitable.” 

“This ends here,” I said, summoning all the courage I could muster. “Leave me alone.” 

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CHAPTER 111: DARE TO LOVE M… 

“Paula…” 

“No, please go,” I cut him off and walked to open the door. Patrick ran a hand through his hair. “Just go,” I pressed down hard on the doorknob. 

I noticed him take a deep breath and do as I asked. I pressed my back against the closed door, refusing to feel the emotions welling up inside me. I couldn’t, I couldn’t feel this way. 

I decided to get into bed and not think about anything, trying to control my feelings. 

I woke up feeling tired, a heavy weight on my body. I sat up in bed and thought about the pregnancy. Things had gotten even more complicated after last night. 

I went back to my routine, going to university and then to the cafe, seriously considering quitting. 

“You don’t look well,” my coworker commented, a little worried. 

“I’m fine, don’t worry,” I said, squeezing her arm and preparing for my shift. 

During the afternoon, something I never expected to see happened. Darius Russell walked into 

the cafe and sat at one of the tables. My coworker looked at me and walked over to him to 

take his order. 

I watched them, trying to pay attention to what I was doing, but my coworker turned to me and 

came over. 

“He wants you to take his order,” she said, and I frowned. The cafe owner looked at us, and 

before she could ask any questions, I walked over to the man’s table. 

“Good afternoon,” I said, feeling a little nervous. 

“A coffee,” the man said, looking up. I nodded and took his order, quickly turning to get his 

drink. 

“So, you’re my son’s lover,” he said in a low voice that only I could hear. I opened my eyes and 

stopped dead in my tracks. 

“I understand that you’re a couple of young people getting carried away, but I can’t let this continue. Patrick has a wife, and I imagine you know the situation you’re in. It’s not good,” he 

said, looking at me. 

“I would advise you to stay away from my son. You both have a future ahead of you. You have a scholarship and the opportunity to support yourself.” He looked around the cafe. “Continuing this… relationship will only make you lose what little you have. Don’t take it personally, I would do this with any woman in your place. I hope I’ve made myself clear,” he said in the same low 

tone. 

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CHAPTER 111: DARE TO LOVE M… 

“Is that all?” I asked through gritted teeth, annoyed by this situation that was spiraling out of control. 

“That’s all, I hope,” he said, throwing some bills on the table. “For the coffee,” he added and stood up to leave. 

I clenched my fists, feeling foolish for getting myself into this mess, just for letting myself get carried away with that i***t Patrick. Now I remembered why I wanted to be alone. 

I sighed when they knocked on my apartment door. 

“Paula, please, we need to talk,” Patrick said, knocking again. He had been coming almost every day. I didn’t need this, not now. My life had been turned upside down in a couple of months. My landlord had already warned me about the noise, so I decided to leave. I was going to another apartment, but the university offered us exchange options, and I decided to leave the city. I transferred to a university in Los Angeles. I felt like it was what I needed right then. I knew I had to tell him about the pregnancy. I would find a way. 

A few weeks had passed since I left Chicago and regained the peace that the whole Patrick situation had stolen from me. I still hadn’t decided what to do about the baby, and I wouldn’t until I found a way to tell Patrick. I was living in the house of some friends of my parents, who 

had rented it to me at a low cost, and I felt comfortable there. 

I was putting the house key in the lock when I heard it. 

“Paula.” I swallowed hard and stopped moving. 

“Patrick,” I said, turning around to see Patrick with his hands in his pockets. 

“What are you doing here?” I asked, not understanding his reasons. He didn’t know about my 

pregnancy yet. 

“Can I come in?” he gestured toward the house, and I nodded silently. 

We both went in, and I hugged myself, waiting for his answer. 

“I needed to see you,” he said. “What I feel for you, it went beyond sex.” He looked down. “I 

wanted a fresh start with you,” he explained. “I’m going to divorce Rachel, and maybe you and 

I…” 

I shook my head. He was still married, after what had happened? 

“She’s still your wife,” I stated. 

“It’s complicated, Paula. My family and her family, we have a business together, my father… 

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it’s not easy, but I’ll do it for you.” 

I sat down, incredulous. Their families? Businesses? Should those words even be in the same 

sentence? 

“No, I don’t want you to do anything for me, Patrick. What you say you feel for me, I don’t feel for you,” I said coldly. “I don’t feel anything for you. I can’t feel anything for someone who lied 

to me the way you did.” 

“I don’t believe you.” He took a step toward me, and I stopped him with my hand. 

“Don’t throw away your millions and your businesses for someone who’s not going to reciprocate your feelings, and who, even if she did, wouldn’t want to belong to the world you 

live in,” I told him. He sat down, running a frustrated hand through his hair. 

“I’m pregnant,” I said. I knew I wouldn’t find a better time to say it. 

Patrick stopped moving and looked at me. 

“I think I’m two or three months along. I still haven’t decided what I’m going to do about the 

pregnancy, but I wanted you to know.” 

“We’re going to have a child,” he said with a hint of excitement. 

“I haven’t decided yet,” I clarified, although something inside me made me want to have the 

baby with each passing day. 

“Paula.” He stood up and took my shoulders. “I’ll take responsibility for the baby if you decide 

to keep it. You and the baby, he or she, won’t want for anything. I promise.” 

I was surprised to hear him say that. I wasn’t expecting a response like that. It took me a few 

minutes to realize that I wanted the baby too. 

“Okay,” I said, and Patrick’s body seemed to relax. 

“We’ll do as you say,” Patrick said, putting his hands in his pockets, and I avoided looking at 

him. 

“I have no idea about anything yet. The only thing I’m sure of is that I don’t want us to be 

associated with you,” I clarified, thinking about his father. I thought he would be capable of 

anything if he found out about my pregnancy or that he had a child with me. 

“Paula, our child will be a Russell,” Patrick said, looking upset. 

“No, I want the baby to have a quiet life, away from everything that surrounds you. The baby 

will have my last name when it’s born,” I said, and Patrick rubbed his temple. “Those are my 

conditions. You said we would do as I say.” 

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“Damn it, Paula,” he sighed in frustration. “Fine. Although it’s still very early to talk about this, but fine.” 

“I’ll be traveling between the UK and the UK from now on, but I’ll be in touch.” He handed me a card. “Maybe at some point, you’ll change your mind about us.” He looked into my eyes, and I knew I wouldn’t be able to. Even though I denied it, all of this had hurt me deeply. 

Patrick left, and I closed the door behind him, leaning against it, refusing to feel. 

Present Day, the UK. Before Alaia’s trip to Los Angeles. 

“You could never forgive me,” Patrick spoke. All these years had passed, and I had allowed myself to talk to him while we were with our grandchildren. 

“I was, and still am, a difficult woman. I couldn’t forget your betrayal. You stayed married, you had a son with Rachel,” I said, and Patrick nodded. 

“You went on dates, you never let me get close. My marriage to Rachel completely fell apart after what happened between us. Aidan was the product of insemination. Rachel wanted a 

child, so we came to an agreement,” he said, looking at Noah in his arms. 

I had protected my heart so much that in the end, I couldn’t trust anyone else. I went out with people on two occasions, but I preferred my daughter. I closed myself off to love, to focus on 

her, and for fear of getting hurt. I think I was extreme. I looked up at Patrick. He was still the attractive man I had met, but my barriers to love had damaged me. I thought I would be incapable of feeling love again. 

I looked at Alana, but I could feel Patrick’s eyes on me. 

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