Don’t Count Me Out
Chapter 52
Addison’s POV
Phillip is a wonderful man. He is thoughtful and patient. I knew he loved me. I hate that he got embarrassed today by what my grandmother said. She was right but shouldn’t have said it in front of everyone like she did. I could tell that he was still upset by her words. He would be even more upset if he knew what she told me before she left.
“Addison, my dear, I know that you were hurt. But you can’t waver on this. This is your life. You already know in your heart who you want, who you love. Yes, Garrett hurt you, but I saw his face when he arrived. His feelings for you were clear for everyone here to see. That man loves you. I am sorry that Phillip might get hurt, but I warned him of that before he proposed. I am sure you would be content with him and have an acceptable life. But it wouldn’t be the relationship I know you would have with Garrett. Don’t let your anger blind you. I want you to
have a happy life,” my Gigi told me.
“He has put me through so much pain over the last five years. I’m not even counting the three years previous. How can I trust him, Gigi? If I give him another chance, he might grind my heart into dust,” I replied.
“You have caused him pain for the last five years, too. You heard him. He did what he knew you needed him to until he saw that awful gossip rag. He thought you had a child with another
and had moved on. It wasn’t just you suffering all these years. Your aunt was wrong. I know
she did what she did from a place of anger. She is still missing your mother after all these years. She connects Garrett with that loss. She is undermining him because of it. She doesn’t even realize that she is doing it yet. I agree that he took advantage of the situation. Your guard was down, and you weren’t thinking properly that day. But that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t love you or that you don’t love him. Talk to him. Find out why he did what he did. I am sure he had a valid reason, or at least thought he did. He suffered, too, Addison. Just give him a
chance for you and Corbin. He deserves to have Garrett in his life. Don’t lose the love of your
life over a misunderstanding,” Gigi responded.
“I don’t want to hurt, Phillip,” I said, glancing over at him. As expected, he was looking back at
- me. His expression showed his frustration. I had expected him to be upset. He hated Garrett,
not for what he had done to me, although that could be a part of it. Garrett was a threat to
him, and he knew it.
“Phillip is a grown man. He is attractive and rich. A hard worker and a good man. He will land
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Don’t Count Me Out
on his feet. He will get upset at losing you, but he will survive. Don’t let his feelings outweigh yours. Phillip is wrong for trying to take Corbin away from his father. You deserve to be happy, Addison. You deserve to feel the fireworks of having a love that can stand the test of time. Don’t punish yourself any longer, Addison. I know you felt bad hiding Corbin. That was also
your aunt’s idea. Do not let her push you into making any more decisions that hurt you in the
long run,” Gigi told me.
“I didn’t want to wait so long, but her explanation was good. I knew he couldn’t make it for
three years, although he almost did. That was why it hurt so badly. He was almost there when
he just gave up. It was frustrating never knowing why he stopped. I don’t want to be hurt like
that again. I’m scared to give him another chance. The last two times blew up in my face,” I
admitted. Fear was precisely what was holding me back.
“I love my daughter, but Garrett is not Alexandra’s enemy. She wants you to pick Phillip, but go
with your heart, Addison. I want you to have a love to last the rest of your life, like your Papa
and I have. That is what your mother would want for you, too. She chose to leave us because
of her love for your father. Do not settle for less. Talk to them both about the future. Think
about what you want, Addison, before rushing into anything. You don’t want to be pressured
into marriage,” my Gigi said with a smile before walking over to speak to Phillip.
I stood there, trying to decide what to do. My heart was screaming for me to choose Garrett.
To run to him right now and give Phillip his ring back. But Phillip had helped me to get past
the pain. He had been there when Garrett wasn’t. Phillip helped me get past my guilt over not
telling Garrett about Corbin. I owed Phillip, but my grandmother was right. I wouldn’t settle. I
would make the decisions based on love.
I wouldn’t be happy despite Phillip loving me, but he would. He wanted more children and to grow our family. We are compatible, I do feel sparks when we kiss and make out. But it is nothing like when Garrett and I were together. When we were together, I felt fireworks. I felt
safe and loved. I felt wanted. I feel them with Phillip, too, but at a lower level. My brain wants
to pick Phillip because he is safe, trustworthy, and a better choice. It is fear telling me to pick him. Phillip had several opportunities to move on as Garrett did. Phillip had several chances to choose another girl, but he never did. He has waited so long for me. Doesn’t he deserve a
chance, too?
My head hurts. This has been a tough day. It is still early, but I feel drained. I just wanted to shower, get dinner, and go to bed early. As Phillip led me inside the house, all his positives were displayed. He made us dinner without being asked. The house smelled terrific. He bought all my favorite things to allow me to soak in the bathtub and set up my bathroom. He is a good man that I know I could come to love.
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“But what if that love never comes?” my subconscious. The familiar scent surrounded me as I lay my head back. I let my mind wander, thinking about what happened today. I wouldn’t admit it, but seeing Garrett hit me hard. I was fooling myself if I thought that I was over him. I wasn’t not. I expected him to scream and yell at me about Corbin. I had expected him to call an attorney and try to take Corbin away from me over what I had done. He did raise his voice for a minute, but he calmed down pretty quickly. He took it much better than I ever thought he would. He seems to want a relationship. Not just with me, but Corbin too. Just thinking of that makes me happy. But I am not going to jump the gun this time.
I wore an oversized T–shirt, leggings, and socks and headed downstairs. Phillip seemed calmer now, and dinner was delicious. He plated the meal while I got our drinks. We worked well together, and dinner was enjoyable. He had even bought candles and lit them for dinner. Anyone looking in would have seen a romantic setting.
Phillip was a romantic, and I always liked how it came so easily for him. He always made me
feel valued and loved. The only issue was I couldn’t see him sweeping the dishes away to take
me on the table. I wanted passion, too. Maybe I have held him back for so long that he is
scared to show me that side of himself. I need to give Phillip a sporting chance, too.
He knew that for a long time after Tripp and Alden, I hadn’t let a man touch me like that. I was
scared to allow it and frightened to learn if I would be paralyzed in fear at his touch. We were both scared of that happening, so we took it slow. I do enjoy getting to kiss Phillip. I have felt his chest through his clothes. I was stunned to realize how ripped he was. That was a pleasant surprise. I knew my aunt had been hinting all week that I should take this opportunity with Phillip. I needed to make sure that Phillip was the one for me. I knew what she meant, and he had waited a long time.
We can see how things progress between us while we are here. It would be best to find out if we can be passionate together. If that’s Gigi’s only issue, we could proceed to find out. Garrett certainly hadn’t been shy about all his conquests. Things could work out well between us if Phillip made me feel like Garrett did. Our conversation flowed, and dinner was the most relaxing part of my day. We worked together tidying up before heading upstairs.
I wanted to design for a little while. I was missing Corbin like crazy. Designing always makes me happy. I hadn’t mentioned it, but I was creating my dream wedding gown. I think having a one–of–a–kind wedding dress is something that many brides dream of having. I hadn’t even mentioned it to my aunt yet. I wanted to complete my dress design before showing her the final product. Then, see what she thought about expanding a section of the shop to include wedding dresses. After my wedding, I would use my own dress in the showroom, on one of the
mannequins.
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It was half done, as I had designed a mermaid shape. I knew I wanted to have a detachable
train for functionality. I wanted to be able to dance unencumbered at the reception, and I didn’t
want to worry about anyone stepping on it or tearing it. I was so focused on my design that I
didn’t hear Phillip knocking on my open door at first. When I heard it again, I saw him smirking
at me.
Phillip had every reason to be cocky right now. His chest was on full display, and it was hard for me not to want to touch it. The physical work he did was evident. He looked great, and he knew it. I have to ask myself how I didn’t notice it before. I noticed it on our first date but then friend–zoned him. I knew he was in shape because of his work and self–defense classes, but I hadn’t expected him to look quite like that.
Every ridge was clear and seemed to beg me to drag my fingertips across them. My mouth was suddenly dry, and I couldn’t tear my eyes away from him. I don’t know how long I stared before letting my gaze drop to see him wearing a pair of lounge pants, riding under his clear V–cut. The lounge pants that weren’t hiding much. I could not hide my reaction from him as my eyes grew large.
I knew he had come to tell me he wouldn’t just give up. Message received. Phillip was interested. That was very apparent, as I noticed he had shifted as I checked him out. He cleared his throat, and when I looked up to meet his eyes, I saw one side of his mouth lifted in a smirk. My decision just got much more difficult.
“I was just bringing you a bottle of water as I saw you were still up,” Phillip said as he approached.
